Attitude of Gratitude

This is so ironic. I actually scheduled a post about Suicide Awareness today (and other random days this month) because September is “Suicide Prevention Awareness Month“. Anyway, as I was running on my treadmill this afternoon, I was listening to my playlist and this song came on and I thought “Hey, I wanna play this everyday as soon as I wake up!”. You see,  it reminded me of my first post. I am grateful I’m alive and I just thought it’s almost my birthday… and it’s something to be grateful for!!!  lol  😉

I just want to share a little something about me, about 10 years ago today,  I  lost my mom to cancer and I was so depressed and I couldn’t shake it off. Being a nurse, I knew it was normal (and acceptable) to be depressed for about 6 months, considering how close I was to my mother. However, it got to a point where I was feeling suicidal. I didn’t really want to kill myself. Not like that. It’s a little more complicated than that. I’m very religious and didn’t want to go to hell. (I’m serious!)  It is hard to explain but there were things that was happening that was leading to it. No, I was not going psychotic. I was not hallucinating. Not hearing voices or seeing things that were not really there. But I was in so much “pain” that I was too scared that if I were by myself, I might do something stupid… irreversible.  I just didn’t trust myself anymore. It was time to see a doctor. I did have to take anti-depressants… for only 3 months (this is “atypical” — please follow your Dr.’s prescription.)… then I was fine.  I am so grateful for my healing. Praise God!  Sometimes, adversity helps us remember not to take anything in life for granted. Keep that in mind. So, that’s it in a nutshell.


Anyway, I remember that when I came back from my trip,  as I mentioned on my first post,  I was like a different person. I came back with a different mindset. I was just really happy, refreshed, inspired, vibrant and filled with a grateful heart. I’m not sure if it was being in a different environment, or seeing how fortunate and blessed  I am to be able to enjoy being a US citizen (I found a new appreciation for my citizenship), to be able to travel and see other parts of the world, go to places others can only dream of, to be able to realize one of my dreams and check off some stuff from my bucket list.


You may think that it is vanity but when I lost my first 25 lbs.when I got back from that trip,  I decided to buy a full length mirror to hang at the end of my hallway. Before then, I didn’t really  want to see my reflection. I mean,  I was fine, I just didn’t care much about seeing myself coz ‘reality check!’ I can’t believe I let myself go. (I probably gained 50-60  lbs from the back injury and depression, maybe. I think I only gained about 10-15 lbs from my pregnancy)  But now, I made it so that when I saw my reflection I would say, “Thank you God for this miracle of health!”. I have struggled with my weight and a lot of pain and with some abnormal labs for years and now I’m not quite perfect but I’m getting there. I’m manageable. My pain is tolerable. I remember just wishing and praying that I would wake up one day pain-free as if that was short of a miracle. And now I can’t even remember how bad it was… I don’t want to remember what I went through.


We have to appreciate what we have. Do we stop and think that as we waste our breath complaining about the things we don’t have, others may be breathing their last. Enjoy every second that God gave you with your loved ones. Just be grateful and stop whining, complaining, blaming or simply being negative or pessimistic about life.


When you feel like complaining about your messy house, thank God for having a healthy and supportive family. Before you complain about your colleagues, be thankful for your job that pays the bills. Next time you feel like whining about about your old car, be grateful that at least you don’t have to take the bus to work, the mall or the grocery store. Imagine how hard it is to carry those heavy grocery bags and walk a few blocks to your house from the bus stop… in the middle of summer or winter. Yikes!

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Don’t waste your breath complaining. Keep in mind that every time you feel like whining , or blaming or criticizing, you have to catch yourself. Shift your energy into something positive instead. Think about things that bring you joy… those that make you feel blessed..  and focus on the things that make you happy and grateful. Feeling grateful almost immediately transforms your mood… your day… your life. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t let these things get in the way of the life you deserve.


” The practice of EXTREME GRATITUDE will transform your life almost immediately. It may lead to joy in the face of  adversity, unshakable inner peace and unwavering freedom.” ~ anonymous


So how do we Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude? You can start with having a Gratitude Journal and write down 5 things daily that you are grateful for. (Sixteen years ago, Oprah started a gratitude journal and, every day, began writing down 5 things she was grateful for. Oprah says acknowledging these things made her more receptive to the goodness in her life.) Do you know that when we are truly grateful for the blessings in our lives, and we take time to give heartfelt acknowledgement for those blessings, we automatically begin to draw more blessings into our lives?  We have to make it a daily habit  of being thankful and reflecting on every single blessing in our lives even in the middle of adversity, no matter how big or small. We have to have faith that something good will come out of it.

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I want to start with me being grateful for all of you being supportive. I feel blessed for having a loving family and friends, a job that’s very fulfilling because I’m able to help a lot of people, for my health, my home.

Please share what you’re grateful for… 🙂





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24 thoughts on “Attitude of Gratitude

  1. I am sorry for your loss my dear.. however, I am glad that you learnt a way to life.. Pain kills us sometimes and can make us feel depressed but coming out of the same and carrying on with life in such a beautiful and appreciating way is worth to be praised!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am sorry for your loss. You went to a bad place, and it is good that you were able to come out of it with a new perspective. I need to take your advice. I always seem to revert back to a negative way of thinking. Thank you for this.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. That you did not allow your circumstances to rule you but steered yourself with love from your pain is wonderful. Stay blessed.

    I am grateful for the many simple things that are basic to living. Food – clothes – shelter. Thank you Good Lord. Amen.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is a wonderful post. From one nurse to another, I am so inspired by your openness about your suicidal thoughts, depression, and how you found your way back from your “dark night of the soul”. Truly inspiring. I will remember not to complain! Thanks to your dedication to suicide awareness, and for helping to reduce the stigma. Simply awesome!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m so sorry for your loss.
        I had one cousin who made a successful attempt to kill himself. I think he was in his early 20’s. He was one of the funny ones and one of my favorites when I was a young girl. I remember how devastating it was for the whole family not coz we lost him but because we felt guilty that we didn’t see the signs to be able to prevent it.


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